Oh, My Lord!
by sweetsheart
Summary: What happens when utter respect and worshipping grows to something incomprehensibly stronger? JustinxShinigami crackity-crack-crack.


**A/N: Oh, sweet Jesus, the crack.**

**It can only mean one thing!**

**Kick Death's been at it again. I knew I had to write this fic when I came up with the name.**

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><p>"Deathscythes dismissed!" the shinigami called in his usual flamboyant style. Marie Mjolnir, Yumi Azusa and Spirit Albarn began to walk out of the office, but Franken Stein and Justin Law stayed.<p>

"Stein, what are you doing?" Marie asked, turning back to the scientist.

"He said 'Deathscythes dismissed.' I'm not a Deathscythe, I'm a-"

"Now is not a time for you to be smart. Now, let's _go_." Marie grabbed Stein's arm and pulled him out of the office. Justin, however, still stood in the presence of his lord.

Shinigami-sama stared down at the blonde young man, what seemed to be a quizzical expression on his mask.

"Justin?" Shinigami-sama asked. Justin blinked quickly

He tried to distract the shinigami from the fact that he was staring. He didn't know why he was staring, no, but he was staring.

There was something about the geometry of his lord… or… was it his power? Was it the fact that he had so much command, yet so much responsibility?

"Do you have a body?" Justin blurted out. Shinigami-sama made a small noise of confusion.

"Huh?" he asked. Justin coughed and adjusted his robes, his blue eyes wide.

"I mean, oh Almighty Lord, do you have a human form?" Justin asked. Shinigami-sama simply chuckled and splayed his hands out to the sides.

"No!" he laughed. Justin's feelings suggested that he would be disappointed with that. But he wasn't. He felt that a human form would have taken away from Shinigami-sama's geometric beauty.

"That's a good thing, my Lord. I must say, I find your geometric form rather… appealing." Justin soon realised what was happening and his cheeks grew red.

"Lord, I'm sorry for my blasphemous thoughts, I-" Justin stopped when he realised a pink tinge to Shinigami-sama's mask.

"Nobody's said that about my form for years… I…" Shinigami-sama turned away, embarrassedly. Justin stepped forward and grabbed one of the points that jutted out from Shinigami-sama's form.

"I think you're stunning, my Lord." Justin said. Shinigami-sama turned around and looked down at his subordinate.

"Justin, I…"

"Would you possibly do me the honour of some time alone, my Lord?" Justin held out his hand to the Death God, who put his garish, white hand on top of the younger man's.

"Of course, Justin." Shinigami-sama began to hop alongside the blonde.

"Under one condition." Shinigami-sama began to clarify.

"Yes, my Lord?" Justin asked. Shinigami-sama laughed and sighed.

"Stop calling me 'My Lord.' You can just call me… Shinigami-kun." Shinigami-sama said. Justin gasped, but decided to follow his orders.

"Okay… Shinigami-kun."

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><p>After a few months of clandestine dating, it came a time where Justin and Shinigami-sama felt close enough to make the most intimate of connections.<p>

It took a little bit of delightfully awkward explanation for Justin to work out what to do.

It was simple in pure principle; Shinigami-sama had, like most people, a major erogenous zone. While it is in a rather private, hidden place for most, for Shinigami-sama, it was in a regular place that was always on show.

"The inside of your eye socket?" Justin asked before their first time.

"Yes." Shinigami-sama replied, simply.

And so, the first time the deed was committed, Justin climbed Shinigami-sama like scaffolding and circled his left eye with his finger. The reactions he evoked within the shinigami were nothing short of shocking. But, after a few goes, Justin got used to it.

Justin and Shinigami-sama were in it for the long haul. And, as most couples, they did not want their relationship to go stale. And a public place seemed appropriately… inappropriate.

"There?" Justin mumbled against Shinigami-sama's mask, as he circled Shinigami-sama's left eye hole with two fingers.

"Uh-huh… uhn… Justin…" Shinigami-sama groaned. He was so immersed in the situation, not to mention the fact that Justin's hand was currently covering one of his eyes, that he did not notice the redheaded Deathscythe standing at the front of the office.

"… Sir?" Spirit asked.

"Spirit?" Shinigami-sama jumped backwards, causing Justin to scream and wrap his arms around Shinigami-sama.

"What are you two doing?" Spirit asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"Dusting!" Justin exclaimed.

"What?" Shinigami-sama asked at the same time Spirit did.

"Dusting!" Justin replied again.

"… Why are you… dusting Shinigami-sama?" Spirit asked. Before Shinigami-sama could respond, Justin began to explain.

"Because he was dusty! And he couldn't see properly out of his eye, so I decided to help! Only the best for my lord!" Justin exclaimed.

"… So why are you riding him?" Spirit posed another question.

"Well, I could hardly reach his eyes from down there, could I?" Justin asked.

"Okay…" Spirit trailed off, but he obviously had another question to pose.

"What is it, Spirit-kun?" Shinigami-sama asked.

"… Why was Shinigami-sama… moaning?" Spirit said, grossed out at the very notion of the death god making any sort of guttural, instinctual noises like that.

"Uh, well…" Shinigami-sama couldn't even explain his way out of that one.

"He was moaning in pain, Mr Albarn," Justin jumped down off of the shinigami, "I mean, if someone was cleaning out _your_ eye sockets, you probably wouldn't like it either." Justin finished. Spirit blinked twice before nodding procedurally and walking out of the office, a shocked look on his face.

On the way down, he was met by Stein and Marie.

"Oh, Spirit, what's wrong?" Marie asked. With one swift movement, he grabbed Stein and Marie's outer shoulders and spun them back around.

"Spirit, what the hell?" Stein asked.

"You do _not_ want to go there." Spirit continued walking, shoving along the blonde and her meister.

"Why?" Marie asked.

"You don't want to know." Spirit said.

"What is it, idiot?" Stein asked. Spirit glared at Stein.

"Well… Shinigami-sama and Justin… they were…"

"What?" Stein asked.

"… I'm pretty sure they were… you know…" Spirit tried to give the two an idea.

"Spit it out." Stein said, sternly.

"Going at it! Like, you know… boning!" Spirit called, eloquent as ever. Marie stopped in her tracks.

"_What?_" she called.

"I walked in, and Justin had his fingers all up in Shinigami-sama's mask, and he was-"

"I'm going to go, yeah." Marie strode away from the two men, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Interesting." Stein mused to himself.

"No! Not interesting! I just walked in on a priest fucking my boss! Not interesting!" Spirit exclaimed.

"Sorry." Stein rolled his eyes, crossing his arms.

"I didn't even know they could _do_ that stuff." Spirit shuddered.

"Seeing as you've basically crowned yourself king of erotica, I'm surprised that you're so affected by this." Stein told the deathscythe. Spirit growled and grabbed the collar of Stein's labcoat. He then proceeded to drag Stein back to the Death Room.

"What are you-" Stein began.

"You can experience it firsthand. _Then_ you can ask why I'm affected." Spirit said. Stein sighed and tugged his labcoat away from Spirit's grasps.

"Fine. It's just _sex_, Spirit, it's a perfectly natural process of-"

"_Oh, my Lord!"_

With those words, Stein froze. And, when the panting guillotine and the breathless shinigami looked up at him with sprung looks, his brain told his legs to turn and basically run away.

"See what I mean?" Spirit jogged alongside the scientist.

"I take it back. That's… that's not… oh, please, make it go away!" Stein cranked his screw backwards as far as it would go.

Back in the Death Room, Justin and Shinigami-sama were both on the floor, Shinigami-sama laughing but Justin sitting, embarrassed.

"I can't believe we got caught… _twice_." Justin's head dropped into his hands. Shinigami-sama laughed once more.

"Come on, it was worth it, no?" Shinigami-sama asked. Justin looked up at Shinigami-sama bashfully, and couldn't help but nod.

"You're hardly the pinnacle of innocence Death City thinks you are, are you?" Justin asked. With that, Shinigami-sama climbed over Justin, enveloping him with his black form.

"Oh, I think you know that answer to that one, Justin." Shinigami-sama chuckled.

And, with that, Justin praised his lord profusely for the rest of the afternoon.


End file.
